Conversation Starters and Techniques

Conversation starters are not much good unless you understand the techniques for becoming a good conversationalist. But, with the right frame of mind and a commitment to practice, learning how to make good conversation can be both fun and easy.

Research shows that developing good communication skills is far more important than getting good grades in school. According to a study at the Stanford University School of Business, the most successful graduates were not the ones with the highest grade point averages. They were the ones most comfortable having friendly conversations with others, particularly strangers.

When you start a conversation with someone you don’t know, it helps to realize that they’re probably feeling just as awkward and tongue-tied as you are. And, if they’re not, then they’ll more than likely have the good manners to be gracious. So, have some fun, jump right in and be the first to speak. You have much to gain and little to lose.

To break the ice, you could make a positive remark about the room, the food, the guest of honor or notice something positive about what the other person is doing, wearing or saying. Then you might offer a sincere compliment. Be friendly, upbeat and enthusiastic. Be willing to chat about the weather, sports, movies, pets or children. The point is to make the other person feel like you’ve been waiting all week to meet them.

Once you’ve broken the ice, follow up with closed-end questions. Are you…? Do you…? Who? Where? Which? Then continue with more open-ended questions. What do you think…? How…? What…? or Why…?

You’ll know what to say next by listening carefully for information the other person is sharing with you – facts, feelings and opinions. Your job is to respond with sincere interest. But be sure to always avoid topics of politics or religion. (You can change the subject, if necessary.) And, naturally, you would never want to argue about anything, even if you disagree.

When it feels right, be willing to share positive, upbeat personal information, but don’t talk too much about yourself. Stay focused on finding out about and getting to know the other person. The bottom line is, if you want people to find you interesting, all you have to do is genuinely express an interest in them. If you do, they might even leave the conversation thinking you’re one of the most fascinating people they ever met. Wouldn’t that be nice?

Pay special attention to noticing when the other person is ready to move on and always end every exchange gracefully on a positive note. Use their name, pay a sincere compliment when possible and always offer a smile or your hand in friendship – “It was so nice talking with you, John. I look forward to seeing you again sometime.” Then say a peasant goodbye.

To be a good conversationalist, just follow these simple guidelines and practice. After all, developing good communication skills could possibly get you further than an M.B.A. from Stanford. With practice, you can turn each conversation into a pleasant experience and maybe even an opportunity – the possibilities are unlimited!

Are You Really Listening: The Importance of Strong Communication Skills

Let's face it, when most people think of IT professionals, the image that comes to mind is the guy or girl with the glasses huddled behind a myriad of computer monitors, incapable of communicating with anyone other than their keyboard

In today's competitive IT marketplace, this person also is exactly the type that no employer wants to bring on board and will, in fact, avoid at all costs. Strong communication skills are one of the most important traits employers are looking for either within the corporate environment or in consulting projects. In many cases, IT professionals are the only ones that really know exactly what they're doing, if they can't communicate well with co-workers, upper management and even prospective employers, the extent of their technical expertise is of no consequence and consequently rendered useless.

If you're one of those people who are immediately felt the hair rise on the back of your neck when you read the introduction above, you're probably putting together a list in your mind of all the reasons you don't believe that strong communication skills are important in the IT industry. In response, I'd like to challenge you to jot down a list of all the people you know who have recently been promoted within the IT industry. Odds are, in 90% of the cases, you will admit that those people were not the ones that had the best technical skills.

In fact, I'd be willing to bet that as you've watched people around you move up within your organization, you've made the comment, "I'm more qualified than he/she is." Be honest, the majority of people who choose IT careers are more comfortable sitting in a cube or office with a piece of hardware than they are sitting in a room of people. It's one of the reasons you were drawn to and probably have been successful in this industry in the first place and it's probably going to be the reason you continue to watch others pass you by for promotions, management positions and in some cases, even independent consulting projects.

The emphasis on strong communication skills for IT professionals has increased dramatically as the field from which employers have to choose from continues to showcase outstanding technical expertise. Technology professionals, however, are no longer being relagated to the background. In many cases, their recommendations and concepts are having a direct and effective impact on overall corporate strategies. Consequently, if you don't have strong communication skills, you might get a job but you'll probably be stuck in it for a long, long time.

While the stereotype of a techie, such as the one described above, is often over exergerated, it is something that you will have to be able to overcome or disprove either in your current position or perhaps in an interview or bidding process. If your personality tests return results like introvert, reserved, or analytical, odds are you've got a few obstacles to overcome. In many projects, you will be asked to explain the value of your work to others within the company.

These other department heads usually have strong communication skills. While most MBA programs are currently addressing communication skills in their programs, for the IT professionals that haven't had the training, the lack of these skills is detrimental to job security and advancement opportunities.

If you're reading this article and can identify with any of the situations mentioned or are already considering spending some time to fine-tune and polish your communication skills, there are many tools available to you in the marketplace. It would be to your benefit to see whether or not your current employer offers and will pay for these types of classes. If not and you realize the importance of strong communication skills in your future success, you're going to have to find your own.

An example of such a program is "People Skills for Techs" offered by Foster Success. This is a course that focuses on developing listening skills and providing feedback to upper management. There are many online courses and seminars available that have been designed specifically with IT professonals in mind. A quick search on the Internet should help you find something in your area. If you're not interested or can't find a particular seminar that appeals to you, however, you may consider hiring a coach or finding a mentor. There are a myriad of companies and independent personal coaches available to help you work on your skills in a more private and individual setting. These programs, however, usually tend to be a little pricey. Mentors, as opposed to coaches, are usually easy to find and often won't cost you more than a lunch, drink, or cup of coffee.

Take a look at your colleagues and take a few minutes to rank their communication skills. If you find someone that seems to have it all together, arrange for an opportunity to talk to him or her about it. In most corporate environments, your co-workers are happy to help. If you have trouble finding someone within your own department, however, don't be afraid to step outside your box. Any one in sales, for example, is usually more than willing to share their communication secrets and in many cases, will be willing to trade information.

In addition to the suggestions above, we strongly suggest that you expose yourself to as many other tools as you can. The easiest way to do this is by picking up a few of the excellent books that are available today. Stephen Covey's The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People is a must for every reading list. Another excellent title is Secrets of a CEO Coach: Your Personal Training Guide to Thinking like a Leader and Acting Like a CEO by D.A. Benton. As you're reading, consider how you can incorporate the techniques into your own personal situation.

The bottom line is that quite simply, despite the level of your technical expertise, you will not be able to compete with someone else who is actually able to communicate its importance.

Why Can't I Start A Conversation With You?

One out of every ten Americans has a fear of talking to strangers. When you enter a room full of new faces, to start these conversations seems like an impossible task. You wait and wait and hope to God someone else says hello first, but the apprehensive silence persists. Then nobody talks to anybody.

This unwillingness to communicate will result in missed opportunities to meet new friends and make valuable connections. Your initial timidity takes time and practice to overcome. However, the more often you throw yourself into the sea, the less likely the waves are to bother you.

Below are four major roadblocks that stand in your way of starting conversations. The solutions to these problems will equip you with the motivation to stop falling asleep behind the conversational wheel.

The Fear of Rejection
They won’t say hello back to me. They won’t be interested in me. I will make a fool of myself.

This is the number one reason people don’t start conversations. However, practice will make this fear fade away. The more you often you start conversations, the better you will become at it. So, be the first to introduce yourself or say hello. When you take an active instead of a passive role, your skills will develop and there will be less of a chance for rejection. Also understand the gains vs. losses. For example, what’s so bad about a rejection from someone you don’t even know? On the other hand, a new contact awaits your introduction!

Nothing Good to Say
I can’t think of anything good to say. I never break the ice. Opening lines are difficult to put into action.

Be certain to ask open ended questions with such words as “How is…?” “Why are…?” and “What was…?” These questions elicit elaboration, explanation and show the other person you have taken an interest in them. Also give a compliment about something you’ve noticed followed by a related inquiry. Not only does this appeal to someone’s personal interests, but it flatters them and satisfies the number one human desire to feel appreciated. Finally, offer an interesting piece of knowledge or trivia. Facts like these are more engaging than the weather and will lead your conversation to new and exciting directions.

Uncertainty of Involvement
All of these people are strangers. I came into the conversation too late. I’m not sure how to get involved with the discussion.

Be an active listener. Make eye contact with the speaker. And, keep your ears open for iceberg statements. These are pieces of free information where ninety percent is under the surface ready to be talked about. For example, listen for an implied statement about someone’s family or a key phrase such as “independent contractor.” Be sure to smile, nod and respond with follow up inquiries. This allows you to become included as a part of the conversation.

Perception of Conversational Value
Small talk is a waste of my time. There’s no reason to interact to these people. I won’t gain anything if I say hello to the woman next to me.

Yes you will! You will gain something if you talk to the woman next to you. People start conversations for five reasons: to help, to learn, to relate, to influence and to play. Think of the potential value! And you never know whom you will meet. “Fear not to entertain strangers for in so doing some will entertain angels unaware.” Remember, some people enter into your lives and change it forever. But, until you own the attitude that every conversation will affect your life, whatever gain is accrued when you engage in social interaction will continue to be outweighed by your fear.

Ultimately, initiating the conversation is half the battle. It’s the most difficult part of interpersonal communication, and therefore an important skill to master. Overcoming your initial fear of rejection will come as you start more conversations, more often. When you use open ended questions which appeal to the needs and interests of others, the probability of rejection will significantly reduce. And, when you become a more active listener with the attitude that conversations do have value, you no longer have to worry about falling asleep behind the conversational wheel.

Starting a Conversation is an Art

Almost all of us have been there. We meet a new person, we run into someone we have met once before, or we see someone we’ve spoken with numerous times. We want to start a meaningful conversation for myriad reasons; yet, we find ourselves asking those trite questions:

. Is this your first time here?

. Did you have trouble finding the building?

. How many people do you think will be coming tonight? And, just for good measure, we throw in a few “hmms” and “ahs” to make us appear even less confident.

Getting off on the right foot

Here are hints to help you feel at ease, make others comfortable, ensure you are memorable after the event and gain helpful information as well.

1. Establish your purpose for attending event.

a. To gather information? It can vary from learning more about the sponsoring organization to making an educated decision about joining to learning more about specific businesses or individuals who are likely to attend.

b. To get referrals? These can include business or job referrals or for support services necessary to run and grow your business.

c. To seek advice or support? This might range from encouragement in a job search or in your venture into entrepreneurship. Or it might be from people in other companies who are employed in the same field or the same industry.

In any case, prepare your “ask for” questions and your “listen for” answers so you sound ready and are prepared to hold stimulating conversations while simultaneously enhancing your knowledge base.

2. Prepare your verbal business card.

Be ready to share with others in one or two sentences what you do … not how you do it or who you are. These logically follow. You want to intrigue people to talk with you while informing them about what you do that will benefit them or people they know. Keep it simple because while people are listening to you, they are also assessing your appearance and behavior, trying to remember your name and planning what they will say.

Always include your first and last name (even your friends have memory lapses!), what you do, benefits to others and active verbs, the most powerful words in the English language. In general, omit your company name (unless it is really well known), your company location, titles, business labels and go easy on adjectives and adverbs. You’ll want to tailor the above information when you are with people from your company or in the same industry. They will understand and even expect jargon.

3.Remember introduction basics.

Even though you learned this in elementary school, you might need a refresher:

a. A younger person is introduced to an older person

b. A man is introduced to a woman

c. A less important person is introduced to a VIP.

In other words, say the name of the person who is older, the woman and the VIP first. You deserve to be addressed as you want to be; however, you must let people know your preference so they can start the conversation correctly. If your printed nametag says “Robert,” and you prefer, “Bob,” it’s fine to cross through the name and print “Bob” on it. Use a felt tip pen so people can easily read it.

4. Weave newcomers into the conversation.

When someone new joins you, immediately introduce him or her to everyone or allow the person an ample opportunity to do. Bring the person up-to-date by quickly reviewing what you were talking about (remember it’s a new conversation for them) and then asking them for an opinion or comment.

5. Remember names.

The start of any conversation is a good place for you to start remembering someone’s name. Hopefully, the person knows to wear the nametag on the right side (unobstructed by lapels or scarves) so that your eye will easily travel to it as you make the initial handshake. Hopefully, the person also knows to say his/her name along with the handshake.

a. Look at the nametag.

b. Listen as the person gives you his/her name.

c. Study the person’s business card to help implant the name in your memory.

d. Repeat it several times during the first few minutes of the conversation.

e. Use it when you introduce the person to others.

f. On another note, it is vital that you use the person’s name as you make your rounds to say “good-bye” to everyone you met.

6. Ask open-ended questions.

The best way to avoid those one-word answers that make you feel as if your attempts at conversation have been thwarted is to not ask “yes” and “no” questions. Or, if you start off with one, have two or three open-ended questions or statements in your pocket at all times. Those one-word answers are sure to get you perspiring if you are the kind who already doesn’t like to start conversations.

7. Practice, practice, practice.

Now, find opportunities to practice what you have learned. Tweak the suggestions to make them work for you. No one pattern fits all.

Effective Business Networking: 5 Tips For Mastering The Art of Networking

The heart of any business is the connection it has with other businesses and individuals that it can call upon to help meet its needs. Networking - any activity designed to create, maintain and utilize interpersonal connections - is an essential business skill. But not all business people take the time to truly master. However, without a solid understanding of how to network effectively and efficiently, no business can make the vital connections that it needs to survive and prosper in today's super-connected economy. Here are some tips you can use to increase your networking - and business - success

Go with a goal. One of the first and most common mistakes that people make when entering a networking situation (planned or otherwise) is to fail to have a firm goal in mind. Are you looking to acquire new prospects, meet colleagues for possible collaborations, create a mutual referral partnership, create name recognition for you and your business, find funding or just "shop around" for interesting news and trends you can use? If you haven't taken the time to determine what your goals are for the encounters ahead, you will have a hard time meeting them.

Of course, most businesses have several different needs, but in many cases any given networking opportunity is unlikely to provide more than one or two types of results, depending on the situation at hand. For example, if you are attending an event made up primarily of others in your industry or trade, you are unlikely to meet prospects, since everyone will be a provider just like you, nor are you likely to find referral partners, since almost everyone will be a direct competitor. So if your primary needs are clients and referrals, such events, while not an entire waste of time, might not be your best use of it. On the other hand, if you are desperately seeking a partner to expand or are looking to find out the latest, greatest technology in the field to offer to your client base, then you're definitely going to be in the right place.

Hone your message. When someone asks you what you do, can you articulate not only your business but it's benefit to them in a clear and concise manner? How about your "elevator speech" or 15-second intro - is it crisp, to the point and compelling, or do people's eyes glaze over before you get to the end? This is not the time to give a dry and deadly-dull job description. Save that for your resume. When someone asks about you and your business, you are being given a golden, but brief, opportunity to knock his or her socks off and to persuade them that you are the best thing to happen to them since sliced bread. Make sure you do so.

Important - leave your sales pitch at home! Networking is networking, and sales is sales. Confuse the two and you'll lose out on both. Nobody wants to be sold to, especially when they're quite plainly not in a sales environment. And remember that anyone who tries to work a networking event under the "three-foot rule" (anyone within three feet is an opportunity to make a sale) is likely to find others unwilling to get within three feet of them in a very short period of time.

Check your gear. Make sure that you have everything you need to make a great impression. Are your business cards or other hand-outs up to date, and as professional-looking as you can make them? If this is a planned event, do you know who will be attending and have you isolated a few people you definitely want to make sure to meet, or are you going in blind and resigned to winging it?

And don't forget to double-check the time, date and venue. Nothing is more irritating than showing up only to find that you're too early, too late or unable to find a parking space closer than a quarter-mile away.

Educate your audience. Are you seeking a collaborative partner for a project? Then make sure everyone knows what the project is and what sort of partner you are looking for (and the general parameters of the partnership they'll be investing their time into). If you're looking for referrals, then do your potential referral sources know what constitutes a good referral for you? It's a waste of your time and a drain on your referrer's good will and reputation if you turn down or do a bad job for everyone they send to you because the referrals were inappropriate. Likewise, a well-educated referral source might wind up sending you fewer referrals, but those are much more likely to be quality prospects that have a high probability of becoming solid clients.

On the other hand, if you are directly prospecting do your prospects know that you're the answer to their prayers and why? Remember that all prospects are tuned into station WII-FM - What's In It For Me - and unless you make sure that they know why they should consider working with you, they won't.

Follow through. The most important part of networking happens after the initial contact. The best impression, the snappiest laser marketing message and the deepest desire to work together will all come to naught if they don't hear from you in a timely manner - or even worse, never hear from you at all. No matter who said what about calling whom, always follow up promptly and in a manner designed to strengthen the relationship and add value for the other person.

A simple follow-up email may be okay for old contacts touching base, but for a new contact that can provide you with crucial funding or superior referrals, or a hot prospect itching to clear your warehouse of your top-shelf merchandise your follow through needs to have all the finesse, power and elegance of a figure skater's best jump - and all the holding power of a solid landing.

There are three keys to an effective follow through:

• It reinforces the original intent of the contact. Refer to your original conversation, restating any key points and reaffirming any agreements that were made or intimated. Follow through on any promises you made to deliver information, provide samples, initiate a meeting, put through a request, whatever - before the follow-up call, unless time constraints or lead-time make that impossible.
• It carries the scent of enthusiasm without the stench of desperation. Follow up as promptly and as regularly or frequently as the circumstance warrants, but don't turn into a stalker or a pest. And if you can find a way to add value to the relationship through your skills, influence, position or connections, by all means offer to do so, but don't cross the line from generous associate to obsequious sycophant. And if the other person makes it clear that they are not interested, move on. "Kicking and screaming" is not an acceptable level of participation in networking, and neither is "beaten into submission."
• It includes the seeds for the next contact. Don't get caught in the dead-end follow up. Unless it is clear that no further relationship is warranted or desired, make sure that there is some agreement on a next step or arrangement made to continue the conversation. Make that phone call and at the end, set up an appointment for lunch a few weeks down the road. At lunch, offer to forward an important report or offer to broker a desirable introduction to someone higher up the food chain, and so on. Make sure you never leave the table without an invitation to resume your seat at a later date.

Like a good golf swing or a stunning presentation, effective networking boils down to three essential stages of activity: preparation, delivery and follow through. And like an electrical circuit with a short or a break, a failure at any of these points stops the flow of life-giving connective energy - the healthy and continually renewed cycle of which your business requires to maintain a strong, stable potential for growth, resilience and success.

Mastering the art of effective networking, like any other business activity, requires time, dedication and attention. But in the end, the dividends it pays are well worth the time it took to cultivate them. Take the time to master these five tips and you will be amply rewarded with the prodigious fruits of your networking labor.

Lesson 14 - What's In A Handshake?

The Story

As a child growing up, one of the many life lessons instilled in me was to wash your hands before eating and after using the restroom. As a child I often played in the dirt and places where germs customarily manifested. Another lesson I learned growing up was when introduced to new acquaintances always shake their hands. It is said to be a polite thing to do, and demonstrates a sign of friendly reception.

I can’t remember the first time I shook someone’s hand, but as an adult I have learned the different handshakes I detest and those I most appreciate. It is frequently said that the handshake is a window into the personality. For example, on the phenomenal television show “Survivor” during the last episode the tribal council selects the winner of the contest. Before the vote, seven remaining tribal members were given an opportunity to ask a question or make a statement to the remaining first and second place contestants.

In the heat of anger one tribal member named Susan verbally lashed out at Kelly who had the deciding vote to cast her from the contest. Susan’s anger stemmed from an alliance that was broken as Rudy, Richard, and Kelly (the last three members) began to fend for themselves as the contest came to its season finale. But after the winner was chosen, the seven tribal members went to give their congratulatory hugs and handshakes. Of course Susan went over to shake hands with Kelly for placing second. While 40 million viewers watched, Kelly refused to shake Susan’s hand. So what’s in a handshake?

Dr. Wade Horn, President of the National Fatherhood Initiative said, “The handshake establishes contact; it sends a message. If I am having an important meeting the handshake will tell me if the meeting was successful.” Dr. Horn went on to explain further that, “If there is a firm, tight, and strong grip at the end of the meeting then the meeting was successful. If not, then that person is disappointed and not pleased with some aspect of the meeting.” He closed by saying “When someone shakes my hand and doesn’t let go then that’s too personal.”

But what does that say about billionaire and former presidential candidate Donald Trump? Mr. Trump, who does not like to shake hands, was met with some controversy when refusing to shake hands on the 2000 presidential campaign trail. The New Republic reported that Donald Trump is “A germ freak. Trump has said he doesn’t want to touch the diseased masses. His campaign hands out half-ounce bottles of hand-cleaner, with Trump’s web-site address taped to the necks.”

Evan Burfield, co-founder and Chief Strategy Officer for the Netdecide Corporation, said “It’s like driving on the highway. People do things that are so uncivilized, things that you they would never do in person. It’s the same way in a corporation; there’s a protective layer that a handshake removes for a second. It lets you understand that you are talking with another person who needs to be treated like a person with trust, respect, and forthrightness.”

Evan added that, “Today we are operating in a cross-gender environment. That man-to-man power struggle handshake doesn’t work with women. It’s a positive to have women involved with everything we do; it softens a lot of the male aggressive rituals.” And speaking of rituals, the handshake has origins more anthropological than historical. Because they carried knives, spears, and rocks, when land was scarce and sacred males would extend their hand to show that they were not attempting to kill their neighbor. To add to that, the classical Greeks were under the impression that the right hands were mysteriously connected to the heart.

The Greeks may not have been very far off point. The handshake is a symbol equivalent of a promise. It becomes a virtue of the word and value of the person extending it. It is an agreement sealed with honor before the lawyers get involved. The handshake is a very valuable tool and, since in business often the communication is one-to-one, it’s flexible and indicates that an agreement has been reached on current dealings. It says that all information and intentions have been disclosed so that the value of the handshake is not diminished. The lesson here is that the handshake historically has carried symbolic importance. It is good to know what your handshake is worth. It’s your word and it says you can deliver on your promises.

Kevin Robertson, president of Vision of Life consulting firm said it best—“Today a man or woman is judged on their handshake, eye contact, and the display of confidence.” This is a far cry from the classical Greeks, or prehistoric man who when all they had to worry about being stabbed or hit with a rock. There were no lawyers and no contracts, just the bond of a man’s word.

The Lesson

What’s in a handshake? The handshake encompasses trust, honor, and communications, follow through and follow up, and represent good faith negotiations. After all, the word of a man and woman still lies in the bond that they will ultimately create.

10 Top Tips for Successful Networking

1. Recognise the importance of networking

Ask any successful business person and they will tell you that above all else networking skills are absolutely vital to grow your business. Networking can increase your market share, help you gain new ideas, provide work and perspectives on life and business. Speaking to one person can potentially give you access to over 200 clients and suppliers.

2. Aim to become visible

You need to let others know you exist and what you do by becoming highly visible and being set apart from the crowd, which is what good networking skills can provide. Be seen and get known. Look for interesting events to go to; clubs, associations, meetings, seminars, conferences, presentations, breakfast briefings, lunches, or start your own networking club.

3. Take care of your image

To have success in networking you need to maintain your self-esteem and build your confidence. Consider how you dress, speak and maintain your body language; aim to present a professional, positive image.

4. Always be positive

By having an open “can do” attitude and having the belief in giving and sharing as well as offering assistance your reputation will soon grow.

5. Treat all events as networking

Going into a specific networking event you may experience fear and trepidation but there is also the thrill and challenge of who potentially you might meet. However we all have all sorts of events we attend which are in effect networking ie meeting people to build mutally beneficial relationships. The networks we belong to can include schools, colleges, work, social life, small businesses, corporate businesses, family, neighbours, advisors or the church.

6. Build your relationships

You need to project an excellent image of warmth, approachability, understanding, knowledge, empathy, and an ability to engage with anyone.. Don’t forget your most powerful contact might not be the most useful to you. Above all be genuine. You should take an interest in everyone you meet, remember their name, listen acutely to them to understand their needs and how you could assist each other. Tact, reassurance and the building of trust are also the hallmarks and vital components of relationship building. Be relaxed and stay interesting.

7. Develop the ability to “small talk”

Being able to talk to anyone about anything is a valuable skill in its own right and essential in networking. Being able to initiate a conversation means you are more likely come into contact with people who may well turn out to be invaluable contacts. Small talk can be difficult but have a few stock phrases up your sleeve such as “How did you get started in…..?”, “What do you particularly need to succeed?” “Where are you going with it next……?”

8. Develop active listening skills

Networking is not about selling it is about listening to the other person and showing them you are interested in them by active listening. Allow others to open up & talk freely. Give you’re your undivided attention even if it is only for five minutes. Take an interest in what’s said and acknowledge this by nodding or agreeing. Use positive body language such as facing them with lots of eye contact. Used subtle mirroring techniques (body language copying) to develop rapport.

9. Use your business card

With the many people you meet this is the only way to maintain the initial contact. 90% of businesses have no card and only 25% have a card that is up to date and informative. At the very least your own should have on it your name, address and phone number and ideally your email address if not your website. Try to include on the back your skills focus to help others identify what you have to offer. You should also create a tracking system to identify and remember all those who you meet.

10. Be organised

Keep a written list of everyone you know and everyone you meet and what they do or keep a database. Write memory joggers on the back of business cards. You may find it useful to keep a diary of who you meet and where and any mutual contacts for future reference.

Create a 10 Second Introduction From Your USP

You can generate a ton of business by networking, whether you belong to a networking organization or just get referrals from existing (satisfied) customers. Whenever you meet a new potential client, it’s important to create the right impression about you and your business straight away. That’s where a 10 second introduction comes in handy – and the more this introduction stands out from the rest, the more likely your new acquaintance is to remember you.

One great way of making your introduction stand out and to really grab the attention of the person you’re introducing yourself to is to put an unexpected twist right at the start. One lady I know starts her introduction: “Hello, I’m Jane Doe, and I want to root through your trash cans.” Now that’s an introduction that nails everybody’s attention – and leaves them wanting more. The lady in question is an environmental consultant and helps companies reduce the amount of waste they produce – hence rooting through the trash.

Spending some time thinking about how you can present your business in a truly unusual light will turn out to be a great investment in the long run. Write down all the things you typically do in your business and see how you can twist them around to make people ask “You can’t really do that for a living?”

But that is only the beginning, of course. Now that you have grabbed their attention you have to follow up with something useful. Nobody would ever hire somebody to go through their trash, no matter how interesting that sounds as a job description. So now’s the time to follow up with your USP, some strong benefits and your guarantee if you have one. Let’s say you’re a printer. Your USP is that you always deliver on time. Your introduction could read:

“Hello, I’m Joe Smith. I’m an undertaker’s nightmare.” Now you should have the undivided attention of the person you’re talking to. An undertaker’s nightmare? So you go on: “That’s because I want to be buried in paperwork.” [Yes, I know, that was a terrible pun. But be honest – it got your attention, right? And that’s what counts.]

“I run a printing business. We do any kind of print run, from as little as 100 copies of a monochrome flyer to ten thousand full-color catalogues. And we promise that we will deliver on time, [USP] so you can be sure to have your materials when you need them [Benefit]. We’re so sure of that that we promise to knock 15% off our fee for each day, should a project ever be late. [Guarantee]”

And that’s your business in a memorable nutshell. Just as the environmental consultant is now known to everybody as “The trash can lady”, this printer could be famous as “The undertaker’s nightmare”. The point is to be instantly recognized and remembered by the people you’ve met – so their next project goes to you instead of the person who just said: “Hello, I’m John Doe and I’m a printer”

So, to recap, a great 10 second introduction needs:

· A way to introduce your business that will grab the listener’s attention.

· A short description of what you do, including your USP and benefits.

· A Guarantee (if you have one. If you don’t, think about getting one!)

Get all these elements together and you’ll see that people will remember you – and give you their business.

You MUST Be Visible

Have you ever noticed how visible large corporations are? Take Coca-Cola®, Nike® and McDonalds®. They are everywhere. Just ask anyone what comes to mind when he/she hears the words soft drink, running shoes or quick burgers. More often than not, you'll hear these brand names immediately.

We've been exposed to these companies so much that it's natural to think of them immediately. We recognize them as experts in their specific industries.

What's the lesson here? Visibility.

As a small business owner, you MUST be visible. If your business isn’t visible to potential clients and customers, then you might as well close the doors.

Visibility is proactively marketing your business in order to effectively attract new customers. Sure, you may have a somewhat consistent client base, but resting on your laurels or just relying on your current client base as your only source of revenue carries an incredibly high risk, one that has been the detriment to countless small businesses.

Visibility is one of the MOST crucial determining factors in the success of your small business. People can't do business with you if they don't know you exist.

How can you proactively be visible?

First, remember you are the number one asset of your small business. More than just getting your name out there, you have to get your face out there in the marketplace. Prospects can turn up in some of the unlikeliest places and when they do, it's your face they need to see in order to consider doing business with you.

For example, take Donald Trump. Whether you admire him or despise him, he's everywhere. A few years ago, who would have thought that he would be hosting one of the most acclaimed network series on television? Who would have thought that he would have a brand new bestselling book? Even while experiencing financial uncertainty in his primary business enterprise, Trump is still going strong. Why? Visibility?

I hear you say, "But, I'm just a small business...I don't have the same endless budgets to be as visible as all those corporate types." As a small business owner, you don't have to have a big budget to be visible.

The secret to small business visibility lies in tapping into the solid gold value of networking. Networking is the high performance vehicle by which small business owners can drive their exposure towards a successful finish.

But the caveat is...it's up to you to take advantage of the opportunities that you do have for networking and to also create your own new opportunities.

Networking is all about people. It gives you the chance to meet new people, make new contacts, exchange ideas and interact with others. This can seem particularly challenging for small business owners who run their businesses from home. It can also seem challenging for those who don't live in larger cities, but rather in smaller towns.

But, there are several ways of navigating these challenges. Consider the valuable networking opportunities with each of these ideas.

One last thing about networking...its not net-sit, net-eat, net-drink or net-hide-in- the-corner-and-don't-talk-to-anyone. It is netWORK.

Chambers of Commerce:

Even the smallest of towns has a local chamber group. Membership fees are typically based upon the annual revenue or number of employees of a business.

If you are a brand new business with limited funds, consider opting for an individual membership at a minimal fee. This will still give you the opportunity to participate in chamber events and meet other people in the business community. It will also give you the opportunity to determine whether your area chamber offers the networking opportunities for which you are looking.

Professional/Industry-Related Associations:

Do you belong to a group or organization relevant to your area of expertise? If so, when was the last time you attended one of its meetings or functions? Do you even know what it's doing these days?

Sure, you may be a member of such a group, but are you an active member? Simply paying your annual dues and not participating is not only a waste of money, but also a waste of a valuable networking and visibility opportunity.

I hear you say, "I don't have time. That's like consorting with the enemy. They're my competition." Rest assured that the time you don't take to make the most of this opportunity to network is time that your competition is taking to maximize its networking opportunities.

Look at it this way. What potential value can you offer one of your competitors that might result in a mutually beneficial situation? How can you benefit from working together? One of your competitors may be able to provide you with a solution to a problem while you can offer a solution to one of his/her problems.

Unless you network, you'll never know. It would be a shame to miss such a valuable opportunity simply because you decide that you don't have time or don't want to face the competition.

The Internet:

Whether you run your business from a small town or even from home in an isolated rural area, the Internet has made networking a worldwide possibility. If you don't have a business web site, then you are missing your absolute best potential for visibility.

Maximize your marketing potential by investing in a business web site. The exposure it generates for you will produce a valuable return of your investment.

However, it is vital that your web site presents your business in a professional light.

If you design your web site yourself, but are not a professional designer...if you scrimp and try to develop a site on the cheap...and if your expertise is not in knowing what content to include in a web site to attract clients...you are presenting yourself to potential clients and customers as an amateur or fly-by-night operation.

This is the LAST thing that you want. Sure, you'd be visible—in a VERY bad way.

In addition to having your own web site, the Internet offers other opportunities for increasing your visibility through networking. Search for professional and/or industry-related web sites in your area of expertise. Post comments or suggestions on industry-related discussion groups or blogs.

Dig a little and you will find valuable resources such as industry-specific forums that offer countless networking opportunities.

Remember, if people don't know you exist, they can't consider doing business with you. Although this sounds like simple common sense, I regularly see small business owners who have no concept of the visibility factor.

You MUST be visible.

When it comes to being visible, they mistakenly think that they "don't have time", "can't make time", "can't afford the investment", "can just hide in their offices and expect the phone to ring" or any other flimsy excuses that gets them nowhere.

The time to drop that rock is now and increase your visibility.

Strategic Networking: Take the Shortest Path to Success

Do you use Ryze or LinkedIn to promote your web based business? If so, you may have noticed that everything is linked to everything else. Here's how to take the shortest path to networking success: use keywords and a targeted linking strategy.

On Ryze and other major networks, connections are happening everywhere. It's like real life, but far more obvious because it's in print before your eyes. But what you may not have noticed, is that keywords are the very thing that drives your online business connections.

Online networks such as Ryze have live links built into them for a reason. They're your opportunity to directly connect with people who can help you achieve your business goals. Such links enable you to "trace a path" from connection to connection. If you think about this long enough, it may occur to you that you can shorten that path to the best connections if you incorporate a linking strategy into your networking plan. How to go about this? Use keywords and "key people" who can help you get to the place in life where you want to be.

Include Keywords In Your Personal Profile

As you build your personal Ryze page, you'll notice that you get to add descriptive words to your profile to define who you are. You're free to use any words you want, but the idea, again, is to take the most direct route to success. So choose words, or keywords if you will, that will help you "find and be found."

Let's use your location as an example. If you click right on the state where you live, you can "pivot" on the word to see a list of every Ryze member who lives in that state, too. The same goes for every other live link you get on Ryze. You are in control of these links.

Now suppose you want to link up to people who share your personal hobbies and interests. Type in the words to describe your interests as they're most commonly known.

Let's say you're a golfer. You can attract other golf enthusiasts with the simple keyword "golf." You can of course type in something like "putting around" but what other golfer is going to choose those exact words for his interest list? Maybe one other guy, and if you can find him then you're soulmates and should probably marry each other. Just kidding!

Remember, the point of online network links is not to be original, but to make connections. If you feeling like getting creative, you can always do that on your homepage. Write fabulous copy. Include breathtaking photos. Just make sure that your links are beefed up with common keywords for prime networking opportunities.

Adding Key People: Target Your Links!

In much the same way that a smart advertiser pulls in his audience using keywords and highly targeted copy in every ad he writes, you should be pointing all your Ryze links to the people, groups, and opportunities that will point your business in a highly focused and profitable direction.

Some Ryze members try to really work the Friends List angle. Every once in a while an aggressive Ryzer sends me a message like, "Hi Dina, I noticed you didn't say hello when you stopped by my page." And then they want to add me to their Friends list right away.

First of all, I know for a fact that I never Ryzed by Joe Bagadonuts's Ryze page, and he's not going to trick me into thinking I did. So tone it down, Joe, you're coming on too strong.

Second of all, I have my own theory about Ryze, and it's that adding everyone to my Friends List is going to defeat the purpose of me being there in the first place.

Think about this: What if you could add every Ryze member to your Friend's List? Pretty cool, huh? You'd be royally hooked up with awesome connections! Right?

No. You'd be right back where you started on Ryze. A massive pool of connections to pore through to do some decent business, and you don't know where to start. Kinda paradoxical, isn't it.

The answer, of course, is to be more selective in who you link to. Hook up with those who offer services, information, support and advice that you need to grow your business. How to do this? Join networks.

Joining the Right Networks Will Bring Hits to Your Page

When you first join Ryze, join networks. Not necessarily a ton of networks, but the ones that will help forward your business objective along. This is how you get "hits" to your page. Why? Because online networks are simply a miniature model of the World Wide Web! You must get out there in order for people to see you, and you must communicate who you are and what you stand for... or no one will know you exist.

Suppose you sell all-natural coffee, and you want to do some writing for the coffee industry as well as put out a newsletter to your email subscriber list of coffee drinkers, which you don't have yet because you only just started your business. Also, somewhere down the line maybe you'd like to revamp your website, but that's not in the budget right now.

Your networking strategy whould be as follows: join a network of coffee fans, another network of natural foodies, a writing group, an email and/or ezine publishing group, and a web design group. Participate in each of those groups. Jump right into the conversation.

You'll find that networks which coincide with your Big Plan, are appealing because members are often interested in achieving the same goals as you are. In talking with them over time, you'll develop mutually beneficial relationships that lead to new opportunities.

Another perk of joining the right networks: new Ryzers and Floating Ryzers who "Ryze on by" the networks will scan the list of members, see your name, and maybe reach out to make a connection with you. That's how to be "found" by the right people. "Target" your networking, and carve a path to success and prosperity for your home-based web business.

Your Friends List is Your Circle of Trust

So now you're probably wondering what the heck that Friends List is for. Your Friends can be anybody you wish, but ideally they should be people you know and trust.

My Friends list orginates from the first dot-com group that I worked for, whose members all belonged to Ryze and urged me to join. It also includes people I "pulled in" from the outside world. In my opinion, and if you don't agree with this, that's perfectly okay... your Ryze Friends List should be a cluster of "set connections" - your Circle of Trust. It should consist of the people with whom you've had positive prior experiences, are making current plans with, and have established solid, long-term relationships.

Why should this matter? Well, I don't know about you but I'd much rather deal with people who I KNOW AND TRUST than random others who merely added me to their friend list to build a huge following. Me, I want strong links in my people chain. But that's just me.

Example: suppose I'm looking to hire a tech guy. Will I contact a tech guy that's connected to a person I barely know? Of course not! I'll choose someone who comes with a recommendation from a trusted friend: someone on my Friends List. All the more reason to keep your Ryze Friends List "pure." I can't explain it any better than this.

Of course, not every network you join will be related to your business. You can join for the social aspect alone, and that's perfectly okay. Because another cool thing about online networking is that you can keep your groups separate if you want!

The best online networks, like Ryze, are ingeniously designed to make the most of your connections in every facet of your business and your life. In much the same way we make real-time connections, online networks afford opportunities to build profitable and trusting relationships. Why not use that to your advantage?